26 /4 Lisa Duffy
Lisa Duffy was one of the few girls I met in 9th grade who was almost as tall as I was. She didn’t slouch to try and make herself shorter. She was tall, lanky, athletic, and smart. Lisa also was very sure of herself. She was the first girl I kissed.
I would find out much later her confidence might have developed because she had two older brothers. Terry, who was two years older than Lisa and was his class’s valedictorian and three-letter sportsman. Her older brother, Rudy Cole, you may have read about. He played basketball for State, and eventually, he went onto play in the NBA.
If you went to school at a parochial school, like I did, each year you received a pass to use the city bus system to get to school. None of those yellow Bluebirds for us. The pass worked year-round, and it didn’t make any difference where you were going and what time of day it was. It made sense because you could be coming or going to school activity at any time of the night or day.
It was good news and bad news for parents. The good news was that since there was no need, they really didn’t have to give us the use of a car. Not only were cars expensive, but they also weren’t convenient in the city. Almost none of the schools had enough parking for the teachers’ much less the students. The bad news for parents was they could never be really sure where we were.
In the fifties and into the sixties, the Catholic schools were not coed. My bus ran downtown directly to St Stanislaus High School. After we got off at our school, the bus continued until it dropped off the girls at St Catherine’s. That was one point of coed contact.
The only other way the sexes got together was at school mixers where kids got together at highly chaperoned dances. This was in the mid-fifties when rock n roll was just gaining traction. It became a leverage issue between students and school officials, many of whom were priests, brothers or nuns.
With considerable parental support, the clerics would lobby against rock music. On the other side of this debate, the kids refused the opportunity to jitterbug or polka. They didn’t show up at the mixers they knew wouldn’t play their music. So the battle lines were drawn. No rock music. No attendance.
The peace came after the older folks bargained to pick the rock music. Let’s just say, for a while at least, there was no Elvis, Little Richard or Fats Domino. Lots of Pat Boone and Neal Diamond. But there was a competitive element also. Once one school played Elvis in an attempt to draw more kids, the others had to follow. Pretty soon, the censorship faded away.
One day I missed my early bus, which meant I would not have time for my morning smoke and a cup of coffee. The coffee was served free by the school, by the way. About six blocks down the route, this girl got on the bus. I was instantly attracted to her. I wanted to get close enough to her to chat her up, but I was in the back of the bus. She is standing near the front of a very crowded vehicle.
The next day I took the same bus and stood near the front. It was even more crowded than the day before. When she got on, I was standing so close to her, I could smell the toothpaste on her breath. We’re standing face to face inches from each other.
“Good Morning,” I said.
She smiled, “Yes it is. I love Fall. The crisp mornings, the colorful leaves.”
“Yes. How’s St. Catherines?
“It’s fine.”
“What are you taking?”
“College Entry.”
“So am I..at St Stan’s, of course.” She chuckled kindly at my slight discomfort.
“Funny I’ve never seen you on this bus until yesterday, and now here you are again. Did you just move here or something?” she said.
“No. Yesterday I missed the early bus I usually take.
"Oh. So you missed it again today.”
“No, today I took it on purpose.”
“Really. Why?”
“Because yesterday I saw this really nice looking girl, and I wanted to meet her.”
“Oh, How a... How a..” she had this smile like a kid with a secret
“Romantic?” I said
“Yeah. I guess that might be a good word.”
I looked out the front of the bus.
“Well, it was nice talking to you. This is my stop.” I started to move toward the door.
“Nice talking to you,” She smiled that smile again, glanced at the floor, looked up, and said, “See you tomorrow?”
“Absolutely. What’s your name anyway?”
“Lisa. Lisa Duffy. And yours.”
“Richard, please don’t call me Dick. Richard Harrison.”
“See you tomorrow, then, Richard.”
The day was brighter. I felt like I was more alive than I had ever been in my life. Of course, I had dream girls, but they were TV and movie stars. And yes, I had stared longingly at girls I went to grade school with and had imaginary love affairs with a couple of my babysitters, but this was different. At least I thought it was then.
My dad told me my hormones were kicking in, but I couldn’t put together the feelings I had that day with body chemistry. This was a girl who told me, albeit subtly, that she had a curiosity, interest, or attraction to me because she just saw me once. Maybe she felt like I did. There had to be a reason for that.
Each morning on the bus, Lisa and I had the kind of conversations we all can relate too. It’s the first date kind of stuff. We talked about the courses we were taking, the teachers we had, the records we liked, and our siblings. The only difference from a first date is you kind of get through those conversations in one evening. In our case, it took several bus rides.
It was a Friday. I remember feeling like I wasn’t going to be able to go all weekend without seeing her. It was when the confident and, I have to admit I discovered, far more mature Lisa Duffy said. “Do you want to get together this weekend?”
I hesitated. She was looking at me with that bemused ‘got you’ look on her face.
“I think that was supposed to be my line,” I said.
“Yeah, but I couldn’t wait.” Then she laughed.
I’m sure she was inspired by the look on my face. I laughed with her, and I saw a bit of relief in her expression. Thank God, he can take a joke, it said. To further confuse things, my stop was coming up, and we hadn’t agreed on when we would meet. Lisa pressed a piece of paper that had her phone number.
“Call me at seven tonight?”
“Yes.”
We had taken two significant steps forward. She gave me her phone number, and we are going on our first date.
That phone call was shorter than I anticipated. I had trailed the long cord of our family telephone into the front hall closet to get some privacy. She picked up on the first ring.
“Hi, Richard?” She was whispering.
“Yes, how are you.”
“Fine, Richard. Do you know where the diner across the street from the Avalon Theater on Blake Avenue is?” Still, she whispered.
“Yeah. Sure.”
“Can you meet me there at one o’clock tomorrow?”
“Yes.”
“Good I’ll see you then.” She hung up.
Okay, I’m a guy. Guys don’t fuss over clothes, accessories, and makeup. However, I did shower, shave, and apply cologne. I wore my gray dress slacks, a white shirt, and a dark blue v-neck sweater. I used a copper bristle brush on my dusty brown buck shoes.
I got to the diner at least twenty minutes early. I couldn’t go in since this place was notorious for ejecting students who just hung out while they nursed a ten-cent glass of coke for hours. Lisa showed up five minutes after I did.
“Hungry?" I asked.
“That would be nice.”
I was smoking a cigarette.
“Could you put that out for me?”
I was crushing it under my foot before she finished her request.
“Thank you.” she leaned over and kissed me on the cheek.
She did it so quickly that if it wasn’t the feel of her lips on my cheek, I wouldn’t have known she done it.
We went into the diner and split a chocolate milkshake. The diner wasn’t very busy, so nobody was glaring at us to move on.
“Have you seen that movie?” Her head gestured toward the Avalon Theater.
I don’t remember the movie, but I knew I hadn’t seen it. In my family, movies were an unnecessary expense, as long as we had the Television set.
“Nope. Have you?”
“No.,” she stared wistfully out the window.
“We could go if you want to. I have enough money for both of us.”
“It would be fun.”
We both got up at once. I paid for the milkshake. Lisa put her hand in mine. We walked to the corner and crossed the street with the traffic light. I spent the fifty cents we needed to get into the movie.
A Saturday matinee included multiple cartoons and a feature film. The cartoons were still being shown when we got into the dark theater.
She reached over and pulled my head next to her and whispered in my ear.
“There are seats all the way in the back.”
I followed her as she walked through the empty back row until we were about halfway in. We sat down. She leaned over again.
“I need to set in back because I’m so tall, and we block the other people’s view.”
Then she pulled my head toward her, and she kissed me gently on the lips. Then not so gently. I remember that sometime later, we came up for air, and I glanced forward.
In a seat, a few rows in front of us looking back was an older lady. The woman didn’t say anything. She just stared at us. Her expression said nothing. Then she turned her head around and looked forward. Based on the little kids seated around her, she was escorting a group of kids to the movies. None of them turned around. They were into whatever was going on on the screen. Two teenagers making out in the back row held no interest for them.
We kissed and kissed some more. At one point, Lisa stopped for a moment, smiled at me, and said, “Make your lips softer, Richard.”
Then she demonstrated. I did what she told me, and all of a sudden, I felt her tongue flicker between my lips. It was unbelievably stimulating for my young inexperienced body.
About twenty minutes later, she said,” I have to go home.”
She got up and waited for me to move out following me until we got outside.
“What bus do you need?” I said.
She smiled. “The sixty. Same as you.”
I told her I would ride all the way to her stop and walk her home. I wasn’t being so chivalrous. I just didn’t want to leave her. She insisted I get off at my stop. She pecked at my cheek one more time before I got off, and as the bus pulled away, Lisa looked out through the window and blew me a parting kiss.
The relationship between Lisa and I didn’t escape the notice of the other kids on the bus. One morning a guy caught up with me after I left the bus and walked the half block to the entrance to St. Stan's.
“Hey Richard.” He was a little winded. I stopped walking and waited until he caught up. I had seen this guy around the school. He was a senior, and we didn’t have any classes together. I was surprised he knew my name. We stood outside the entrance of the school facing each other.
“I just want to give you a heads up.”
“Sure what’s happening?”
“Lisa is going steady with Hal Davies.”
Davies was the starting guard on St Stan's basketball team. I bluffed the guy, who informed me.
“It’s okay, Lisa and I just talk to each other on the bus. Nothing’s going on, ya know?”
He smiled. “Good. Just wanted you to know.”
I smiled back at him. I was playing it as cool as I could, considering his news destroyed my day.
“Thank you. I’m sure Hal doesn’t have anything to worry about,” I said.
I laughed. He laughed. We walked through the doors to our school. The guy never talked to me again about anything.
I pondered, should I bring it up or wait for her to tell me how this was going to go down? After some thought, I figured I had a solution.
Almost every Saturday, we continued to meet at the diner and then go over to the theater to make out in the back row. We kissed and did a little tongue flirting, but she stopped me from going any further, and while it was frustrating, it was better than not kissing her.
My solution to moving the conversation to an area it appeared she didn’t want to go was pretty simple, but the possible outcome was frightening. The next day on the bus, we were in the midst of our twenty block conversation.
“Hey, there’s a mixer at St. Stan's next Friday night. Do you want to go with me?” I said. She smiled.
“I’d love to, and thank you for asking, but I’ve already got a date.” She kept smiling. I hadn’t thought of this kind of response. I took a moment to think.
“Are you upset?” she asked.
“Disappointed would be a better word. I guess I didn’t think of you dating other guys. But of course, you do. What the heck was I thinking?” I smiled at her. "Maybe I could cut in and have a dance?” She frowned.
“I don’t think that would be good.”
“Really?”
“Yes, If I danced with you, Hal would want to know how I knew you and… Well, I’d prefer he didn’t know about us… our relationship. He’d be angry.”
I was without words. Well, that’s not true either. I had words, but I didn’t want to say them.
“Hal thinks we’re going steady. I don’t, but he’s kind of insistent, and he’s my brother’s best friend.”
“I see.” I was still trying to gain my footing. Finally, I asked the most frightening question I could think of.
“So if he thinks you’re going steady and you don’t, what are we doing?”
She reached out and touched my chest.
“We’re friends, Richard. Isn’t that what we are? Isn’t that enough?”
The bus coming to my stop saved me. I smiled at her and said as kindly as I could.
“I was hoping for more.”
I started taking the earlier bus. I didn’t go to St Stan’s or St. Catherine’s mixers. My mom kept asking me what was wrong, so I guess I didn’t hide my disappointment very well.
I only saw Lisa once after that. I went to a St. Stan’s home basketball game. Lisa had a seat behind our team’s bench. I was on the other side of the court. I could look right at her without being obvious.
She didn’t look happy, but maybe I wanted her to be crushed by our breakup, so I imagined it. Plus, the fact that her steady was not playing very well and we were getting our ass kicked. I wasn’t going to get caught in a position where I had to confront her, so with about ten minutes left on the clock, I got up to leave.
Just as I made my way out of the stands and down to the floor, one of the teams called a time out. It might as well have been a spotlight thrown on me. Lisa looked up. I know she saw me because she raised her hand to wave. I got away.
Lisa Duffy was one of the few girls I met in 9th grade who was almost as tall as I was. She didn’t slouch to try and make herself shorter. She was tall, lanky, athletic, and smart. Lisa also was very sure of herself. She was the first girl I kissed.
I would find out much later her confidence might have developed because she had two older brothers. Terry, who was two years older than Lisa and was his class’s valedictorian and three-letter sportsman. Her older brother, Rudy Cole, you may have read about. He played basketball for State, and eventually, he went onto play in the NBA.
If you went to school at a parochial school, like I did, each year you received a pass to use the city bus system to get to school. None of those yellow Bluebirds for us. The pass worked year-round, and it didn’t make any difference where you were going and what time of day it was. It made sense because you could be coming or going to school activity at any time of the night or day.
It was good news and bad news for parents. The good news was that since there was no need, they really didn’t have to give us the use of a car. Not only were cars expensive, but they also weren’t convenient in the city. Almost none of the schools had enough parking for the teachers’ much less the students. The bad news for parents was they could never be really sure where we were.
In the fifties and into the sixties, the Catholic schools were not coed. My bus ran downtown directly to St Stanislaus High School. After we got off at our school, the bus continued until it dropped off the girls at St Catherine’s. That was one point of coed contact.
The only other way the sexes got together was at school mixers where kids got together at highly chaperoned dances. This was in the mid-fifties when rock n roll was just gaining traction. It became a leverage issue between students and school officials, many of whom were priests, brothers or nuns.
With considerable parental support, the clerics would lobby against rock music. On the other side of this debate, the kids refused the opportunity to jitterbug or polka. They didn’t show up at the mixers they knew wouldn’t play their music. So the battle lines were drawn. No rock music. No attendance.
The peace came after the older folks bargained to pick the rock music. Let’s just say, for a while at least, there was no Elvis, Little Richard or Fats Domino. Lots of Pat Boone and Neal Diamond. But there was a competitive element also. Once one school played Elvis in an attempt to draw more kids, the others had to follow. Pretty soon, the censorship faded away.
One day I missed my early bus, which meant I would not have time for my morning smoke and a cup of coffee. The coffee was served free by the school, by the way. About six blocks down the route, this girl got on the bus. I was instantly attracted to her. I wanted to get close enough to her to chat her up, but I was in the back of the bus. She is standing near the front of a very crowded vehicle.
The next day I took the same bus and stood near the front. It was even more crowded than the day before. When she got on, I was standing so close to her, I could smell the toothpaste on her breath. We’re standing face to face inches from each other.
“Good Morning,” I said.
She smiled, “Yes it is. I love Fall. The crisp mornings, the colorful leaves.”
“Yes. How’s St. Catherines?
“It’s fine.”
“What are you taking?”
“College Entry.”
“So am I..at St Stan’s, of course.” She chuckled kindly at my slight discomfort.
“Funny I’ve never seen you on this bus until yesterday, and now here you are again. Did you just move here or something?” she said.
“No. Yesterday I missed the early bus I usually take.
"Oh. So you missed it again today.”
“No, today I took it on purpose.”
“Really. Why?”
“Because yesterday I saw this really nice looking girl, and I wanted to meet her.”
“Oh, How a... How a..” she had this smile like a kid with a secret
“Romantic?” I said
“Yeah. I guess that might be a good word.”
I looked out the front of the bus.
“Well, it was nice talking to you. This is my stop.” I started to move toward the door.
“Nice talking to you,” She smiled that smile again, glanced at the floor, looked up, and said, “See you tomorrow?”
“Absolutely. What’s your name anyway?”
“Lisa. Lisa Duffy. And yours.”
“Richard, please don’t call me Dick. Richard Harrison.”
“See you tomorrow, then, Richard.”
The day was brighter. I felt like I was more alive than I had ever been in my life. Of course, I had dream girls, but they were TV and movie stars. And yes, I had stared longingly at girls I went to grade school with and had imaginary love affairs with a couple of my babysitters, but this was different. At least I thought it was then.
My dad told me my hormones were kicking in, but I couldn’t put together the feelings I had that day with body chemistry. This was a girl who told me, albeit subtly, that she had a curiosity, interest, or attraction to me because she just saw me once. Maybe she felt like I did. There had to be a reason for that.
Each morning on the bus, Lisa and I had the kind of conversations we all can relate too. It’s the first date kind of stuff. We talked about the courses we were taking, the teachers we had, the records we liked, and our siblings. The only difference from a first date is you kind of get through those conversations in one evening. In our case, it took several bus rides.
It was a Friday. I remember feeling like I wasn’t going to be able to go all weekend without seeing her. It was when the confident and, I have to admit I discovered, far more mature Lisa Duffy said. “Do you want to get together this weekend?”
I hesitated. She was looking at me with that bemused ‘got you’ look on her face.
“I think that was supposed to be my line,” I said.
“Yeah, but I couldn’t wait.” Then she laughed.
I’m sure she was inspired by the look on my face. I laughed with her, and I saw a bit of relief in her expression. Thank God, he can take a joke, it said. To further confuse things, my stop was coming up, and we hadn’t agreed on when we would meet. Lisa pressed a piece of paper that had her phone number.
“Call me at seven tonight?”
“Yes.”
We had taken two significant steps forward. She gave me her phone number, and we are going on our first date.
That phone call was shorter than I anticipated. I had trailed the long cord of our family telephone into the front hall closet to get some privacy. She picked up on the first ring.
“Hi, Richard?” She was whispering.
“Yes, how are you.”
“Fine, Richard. Do you know where the diner across the street from the Avalon Theater on Blake Avenue is?” Still, she whispered.
“Yeah. Sure.”
“Can you meet me there at one o’clock tomorrow?”
“Yes.”
“Good I’ll see you then.” She hung up.
Okay, I’m a guy. Guys don’t fuss over clothes, accessories, and makeup. However, I did shower, shave, and apply cologne. I wore my gray dress slacks, a white shirt, and a dark blue v-neck sweater. I used a copper bristle brush on my dusty brown buck shoes.
I got to the diner at least twenty minutes early. I couldn’t go in since this place was notorious for ejecting students who just hung out while they nursed a ten-cent glass of coke for hours. Lisa showed up five minutes after I did.
“Hungry?" I asked.
“That would be nice.”
I was smoking a cigarette.
“Could you put that out for me?”
I was crushing it under my foot before she finished her request.
“Thank you.” she leaned over and kissed me on the cheek.
She did it so quickly that if it wasn’t the feel of her lips on my cheek, I wouldn’t have known she done it.
We went into the diner and split a chocolate milkshake. The diner wasn’t very busy, so nobody was glaring at us to move on.
“Have you seen that movie?” Her head gestured toward the Avalon Theater.
I don’t remember the movie, but I knew I hadn’t seen it. In my family, movies were an unnecessary expense, as long as we had the Television set.
“Nope. Have you?”
“No.,” she stared wistfully out the window.
“We could go if you want to. I have enough money for both of us.”
“It would be fun.”
We both got up at once. I paid for the milkshake. Lisa put her hand in mine. We walked to the corner and crossed the street with the traffic light. I spent the fifty cents we needed to get into the movie.
A Saturday matinee included multiple cartoons and a feature film. The cartoons were still being shown when we got into the dark theater.
She reached over and pulled my head next to her and whispered in my ear.
“There are seats all the way in the back.”
I followed her as she walked through the empty back row until we were about halfway in. We sat down. She leaned over again.
“I need to set in back because I’m so tall, and we block the other people’s view.”
Then she pulled my head toward her, and she kissed me gently on the lips. Then not so gently. I remember that sometime later, we came up for air, and I glanced forward.
In a seat, a few rows in front of us looking back was an older lady. The woman didn’t say anything. She just stared at us. Her expression said nothing. Then she turned her head around and looked forward. Based on the little kids seated around her, she was escorting a group of kids to the movies. None of them turned around. They were into whatever was going on on the screen. Two teenagers making out in the back row held no interest for them.
We kissed and kissed some more. At one point, Lisa stopped for a moment, smiled at me, and said, “Make your lips softer, Richard.”
Then she demonstrated. I did what she told me, and all of a sudden, I felt her tongue flicker between my lips. It was unbelievably stimulating for my young inexperienced body.
About twenty minutes later, she said,” I have to go home.”
She got up and waited for me to move out following me until we got outside.
“What bus do you need?” I said.
She smiled. “The sixty. Same as you.”
I told her I would ride all the way to her stop and walk her home. I wasn’t being so chivalrous. I just didn’t want to leave her. She insisted I get off at my stop. She pecked at my cheek one more time before I got off, and as the bus pulled away, Lisa looked out through the window and blew me a parting kiss.
The relationship between Lisa and I didn’t escape the notice of the other kids on the bus. One morning a guy caught up with me after I left the bus and walked the half block to the entrance to St. Stan's.
“Hey Richard.” He was a little winded. I stopped walking and waited until he caught up. I had seen this guy around the school. He was a senior, and we didn’t have any classes together. I was surprised he knew my name. We stood outside the entrance of the school facing each other.
“I just want to give you a heads up.”
“Sure what’s happening?”
“Lisa is going steady with Hal Davies.”
Davies was the starting guard on St Stan's basketball team. I bluffed the guy, who informed me.
“It’s okay, Lisa and I just talk to each other on the bus. Nothing’s going on, ya know?”
He smiled. “Good. Just wanted you to know.”
I smiled back at him. I was playing it as cool as I could, considering his news destroyed my day.
“Thank you. I’m sure Hal doesn’t have anything to worry about,” I said.
I laughed. He laughed. We walked through the doors to our school. The guy never talked to me again about anything.
I pondered, should I bring it up or wait for her to tell me how this was going to go down? After some thought, I figured I had a solution.
Almost every Saturday, we continued to meet at the diner and then go over to the theater to make out in the back row. We kissed and did a little tongue flirting, but she stopped me from going any further, and while it was frustrating, it was better than not kissing her.
My solution to moving the conversation to an area it appeared she didn’t want to go was pretty simple, but the possible outcome was frightening. The next day on the bus, we were in the midst of our twenty block conversation.
“Hey, there’s a mixer at St. Stan's next Friday night. Do you want to go with me?” I said. She smiled.
“I’d love to, and thank you for asking, but I’ve already got a date.” She kept smiling. I hadn’t thought of this kind of response. I took a moment to think.
“Are you upset?” she asked.
“Disappointed would be a better word. I guess I didn’t think of you dating other guys. But of course, you do. What the heck was I thinking?” I smiled at her. "Maybe I could cut in and have a dance?” She frowned.
“I don’t think that would be good.”
“Really?”
“Yes, If I danced with you, Hal would want to know how I knew you and… Well, I’d prefer he didn’t know about us… our relationship. He’d be angry.”
I was without words. Well, that’s not true either. I had words, but I didn’t want to say them.
“Hal thinks we’re going steady. I don’t, but he’s kind of insistent, and he’s my brother’s best friend.”
“I see.” I was still trying to gain my footing. Finally, I asked the most frightening question I could think of.
“So if he thinks you’re going steady and you don’t, what are we doing?”
She reached out and touched my chest.
“We’re friends, Richard. Isn’t that what we are? Isn’t that enough?”
The bus coming to my stop saved me. I smiled at her and said as kindly as I could.
“I was hoping for more.”
I started taking the earlier bus. I didn’t go to St Stan’s or St. Catherine’s mixers. My mom kept asking me what was wrong, so I guess I didn’t hide my disappointment very well.
I only saw Lisa once after that. I went to a St. Stan’s home basketball game. Lisa had a seat behind our team’s bench. I was on the other side of the court. I could look right at her without being obvious.
She didn’t look happy, but maybe I wanted her to be crushed by our breakup, so I imagined it. Plus, the fact that her steady was not playing very well and we were getting our ass kicked. I wasn’t going to get caught in a position where I had to confront her, so with about ten minutes left on the clock, I got up to leave.
Just as I made my way out of the stands and down to the floor, one of the teams called a time out. It might as well have been a spotlight thrown on me. Lisa looked up. I know she saw me because she raised her hand to wave. I got away.
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